There isn’t a process that will produce the right response to all situations, but we can consider how to respond in some circumstances. Here’s a useful threesome.
1. A word on client relations— “Yes” We aim to attract and retain satisfied, even happy, clients. Every company has its own approach to marketing, securing, and maintaining clients, including internal processes and standard contracts. However, there are times when a little flexibility can go a long way. Instead of a knee-jerk “No,” we should consider how a creative “Yes” might work for both the client and the company.
A potential client asked us to change a work-intensive provision in our standard contract. Internal response: We can’t do that! Actual answer: Of course, we can; they’re going to pay for it. A higher project fee covered the client’s legitimate need – at no cost to us. They were thrilled. Win-win.
That same attitude can hold up beyond clients. When appropriate, try it with suppliers, vendors, etc.
2. “Care—but not too much” is the motto of Herbie Cohen, The World’s Greatest Negotiator. This is the other side of a coin of saying “Yes” or hopping on a plane to make something happen [see The Pinball Theory of Business & Life]. Sometimes, a balanced, even reserved, attitude serves just as well. We should care—but not too much.
Before I had heard of Herbie, I embraced his motto. I used to say privately, “We’re never selling, and we’re always selling.” The idea was to create a situation where potential clients would be so impressed with our services that they would ask—beg! —to work with us. I would say, “If we can be helpful, we’d love to work with you. But if it doesn’t work out, that’s fine too. There are other companies you might find out there.”
The strongest position in business or legal negotiations is being ready to walk away—no matter how much you want the deal. We should care—but not too much.
3. There’s a stronger word for it, but let’s just say: Say “No” to Jerks. Seeking new business and accommodating customers is important—but that doesn’t mean we should work with everyone. Some clients and customers abuse the team, overuse resources, and underappreciate our efforts. Many of us have had the unfortunate experience of wishing we had never started doing business with them.
From the start, these individuals are difficult and often rude. They demand changes to our standard process and contracts, are never satisfied, constantly complain, berate the team, dispute every invoice, and make everyone miserable. We often blame ourselves—or someone else—for getting into business with them in the first place. But sales were down, cash flow was tight, quotas needed to be met, and we convinced ourselves, They’ll be fine once they see how good we are. Wishful thinking. The truth is, it’s best to turn people like this away at the first sign of trouble.
My colleagues were upset. They had a potential client on hold, unsure how to handle his aggressive and demanding manner. We had enough experience with people like him—we didn’t need his business. I put the caller on speaker. I told him what my colleagues had shared with me. He didn’t even try to deny it. I told him this wasn’t a good fit for us, and he needed to find another company.
Recognizing that his usual bullying tactics were failing, the backpedaling began: “What I meant was…” I cut him off. “I’ve already heard about your important company, the big project, and your urgent deadline. But this isn’t the first time you have been abusive to our team, and that’s unacceptable. We don’t work that way, and we’re not taking the project.” After a brief, toned-down exchange, we ended the conversation. I still feel my blood boil when I think about it, but I’m glad we didn’t say, “Yes.”
Not only did we avoid an inevitably toxic client relationship, but we acted in our company’s best interest and demonstrated respect for our team. These types of clients often make up only a small percentage of revenue—likely even less in profit, given how much they drain resources—but they account for a disproportionate percentage of stress. One of my business partners summed it up best:
It’s not so important with whom we do business,
but incredibly important with whom we do not do business.
